Boo, it’s time to spoil yourself.
If that immediately caused you to scoff in “I wish” or “yea, right” I totally get it. I’ve been there.
All around us we’re being told to take care of ourselves while also being told that it’s selfish to get anything more for ourselves than the true ‘needs’. Especially for survivors of abuse, we feel like we don’t deserve the bare necessities let alone any “spoiling.”
I’m here telling you that it’s all garbage. You don’t only deserve to spoil yourself, you need to.
Before you click off of the page, take a deep breath.
I’m going to walk you through how to bust past the “selfish” mindset, why spoiling yourself is important and how to do it in a way that feels amazing.
Spoiling yourself isn’t selfish
For whatever reason, we’ve been taught that spoiling yourself is selfish. That doing anything for yourself, that investing in anything you enjoy, is wrong. But that’s the most garbage thing I’ve heard.
Selfishness is when you take care of your wants before ever considering that something else needs to be a priority. This means it is also selfish to put your want to do everything for everyone else before your needs, which need to be a solid priority.
Of course we can list off needs like food, shelter, and clothing. But in order to remain healthy in every aspect of our life, it goes so much deeper than that. Our needs include personal development, having solid boundaries, fulfillment in life, career and relationships.
When I say “spoil yourself,” I’m not saying to flip over the table of responsibilities and go after things that only benefit you all the time. But I am saying that making yourself and your needs a priority is incredibly important and necessary.
We’ve got to flip the script. Spoiling yourself is investing in yourself.
Why you need to invest in yourself
“Ok Karleigh I get it, spoiling myself isn’t selfish. But why do I need to do it anyway?”
Imagine that someone is incredibly thirsty and they grab the water jug, so excited to pour themselves a glass. But when they tip it over, it’s empty.
You’re the jug. If it’s empty, you can’t do what you need to do in order to help others. If the jug is full, they would find refreshment and relief.
While investing in yourself for yourself is valid, so many times we struggle to do things for ourselves because we deem others more important. So if you need to think about how spoiling yourself will benefit others, go right ahead.
The more you invest in yourself, the more you grow. The more you grow, the more you can help others. This causes a ripple effect that can reach more people than you ever thought possible.
How to Spoil Yourself
When someone says “spoil yourself” or “invest in yourself,” the first thought that comes to mind is spending money. And while that is definitely a way you can, and should, invest in yourself, it’s not the only way.
You also need to invest time and effort.
What does that look like? Let’s break each of them down.
Invest your money
Investing in yourself with money can be done in just about every area of your life. It could be investing in high quality food to keep your health in tip top shape. Maybe it’s buying an online course that will teach you something that would take you forever to learn if you were to do it on your own. It could be buying that personal development book or hiring a coach. Whatever it is, it’s spending money on something that’s going to help you grow.
Invest your time.
Think about the amount you have in a day as a currency. You have 24 hours in a day. You need to invest around 8 hours into sleep in order to function properly and be at your best. So that leaves about 16 hours left. If you can commit to spending (investing) 30 minutes a day reading on a topic that you want to grow in. This could be listening to a podcast on your way to work instead of jamming out to your playlist. You could invest that time working through a course or researching something you’ve been wanting to learn about.
Invest your effort.
You’ve invested the time into learning something. Now you’ve got to put in the effort to apply it to your life. Investing financially in yourself is great. Investing time in yourself is awesome. But if you don’t invest the effort to actually make it happen, it isn’t going to do all that much for you. So you have to make sure that you put in the effort needed to see results in your own life.
The idea of spoiling ourselves isn’t always super well received. Many people subscribe to the belief that it’s inherently selfish to make ourselves a priority. But as you’ve learned today, spoiling yourself isn’t selfish. In fact, it’s selfish not to.
By investing money, time, and effort into yourself, you’re going to be able to do more than you ever thought possible.
Take a moment and be proud of the fact that you’re investing in yourself. Shout yourself out, cheer yourself on and then find a community of people who will do the same for you.
You’ve got this, boo!
If this resonated with you and you’re ready to spoil (ahem, invest) in yourself, then you should check out the Worthy of Recovery printable journal. Every day for 30 days you’ll complete a journal prompt and document your gratitude and your daily victories. Worried that you don’t have the time? Included with the journal is a course that teaches you how to journal your way to freedom in less than 15 minutes a day. As an added bonus, you also get over 45 printable affirmation cards. It has all the pieces that helped me on my recovery journey and I know it’ll help you, too. Click here to grab yours!